So Punny I Forgot to Laugh


I’m a sucker for puns (a pun-sucker?). I laugh out loud at good ones. I’ve found, however, that I am the exception in this respect. Most people are rather inclined to groan than guffaw. Nevertheless, I share the following for those kindred spirits who happen to visit. My thanks to Randi Crumrine, who passed most of these on to me some time ago. I added a few of my own.

  • Those who jump off a bridge in Paris are in Seine.
  • Shotgun weddings: a case of wife or death.
  • Reading while sunbathing makes you well red.
  • When two egotists meet, it’s an I for an I.
  • A bicycle can’t stand on its own because it’s two-tired.
  • Definition of a will: a dead give-away.
  • Time flies like an arrow. Fruit flies like a banana.
  • In a democracy, your vote counts. In feudalism, your count votes.
  • A chicken crossing the road: poultry in motion.
  • If you don’t pay your exorcist, you get repossessed.
  • When she got married, she got a new name and a dress.
  • Did you hear about the man who fell into an upholstery machine? He’s fully recovered.
  • Did you hear about the glass blower who inhaled? He had a pane in his stomach.
  • If you feel stuck in debt, it’s because you can’t budge it.
  • A boiled egg in the morning is hard to beat.
  • Those who are too big for their britches will be exposed in the end.
  • If you’ve seen one shopping center, you’ve seen a mall.
  • A midget fortune teller who breaks out of prison: a small medium at-large.


Like this article? Please consider sharing it or subscribing to our weekly email update! Post any comments and questions below. Bloggers love comments.

About the Author

Brian WaskoBrian is the founder and president of One of his passions is to teach young people how to write better.View all posts by Brian Wasko

Leave a Reply

If you like a post, please take a second to click "like," and comment as often as you like.
We promise not to correct your grammar!